I learned this morning that my Grandma had passed on last night at the age of 92. In many ways this was a big relief. She'd been in pretty bad shape for quite a few months with a very low quality of life. So I'm glad to know she's finally in a much better place.

When I was younger my younger brother and I were fortunate in that we got to spend quite a bit of time with all of my grandparents. Both sets of grandparents lived a mile apart about 40 minutes from our home in Southern California. Unfortunately my Grandma on my Dad's side, Jane Ingram, was the last one to survive. While we're all saddened by her loss I was so lucky to have all 4 of my grandparents growing up until I was 18.

Grandma Ingram was always a lot of fun. She was the biggest spoiler of them all. I'm sure my parents loved all of the ultra sweat cereals and cookies that she would always have an unlimited supply of when we were around. There was never any doubt that she loved her Grandchildren.

She also had the biggest heart. I'm not sure that my Grandma ever missed a Sunday at church. The same church where my parents were married and she was a Deacon before her health really started to decline. Then after church she volunteered for Meals on Wheels for as long as I can remember. She never missed, and every now and then she'd bring me along. That was a gift.

Sharp and whitty were her middle names. Much earlier in her life she worked at a Women's Prison. There was an incident that she would occasionally joke about. She would say that she was very quick with the trigger, but a little slow on the draw... That was the time she shot herself in her own leg.

I would hope that she counts her son, my dad, and her grandkids as one of her greatest accomplishments. If the way that we turned out is any testament to the kind of woman she was (especially my Dad), then I know she'll go far and enjoy her new home.

We'll miss you Grandma, I love you.

-Your Loving Grandson

In the last few weeks I've been engaged in my own online networking experiment (using social media, web 2.0 or whatever you want to call it). I've been a big fan of LinkedIN for a couple of years now, but until a few weeks ago hadn't made the leap to Twitter, Facebook, etc. You can expect to find a series of posts here about the results of my own experiments. I also feel pretty close to developing my own strategy for leveraging all of these tools as a professional which I'll share with you here as well.

I thought I'd start with a little bit about Twitter. My first impression of Twitter was that these quick little updates were an asinine waste of time. How could writing and following constant updates possibly be productive? I was amazed at how quickly I was turned around. I quickly realized that there's almost no better way to deepen some of your relationships. I have friends who I follow on Twitter who I see in person once or twice a week on average. I'm way more connected to them and what's going on in their lives now that I'm following them on Twitter. Again, I'll write more about this, but this benefit alone makes any and all of the effort worth it.
 
Even more recently I've found that you can find numerous ways to give referrals to and otherwise help those that you're following since you know what's going on with them. In a very recent example a friend and I started following each other on Twitter. I learned that he's intensively working on learning a new technology. Several days later I received an e-mail about a local conference on this very topic. I was able to forward that e-mail and within a day he was registered for the conference. How cool is that? Without Twitter I never would have known that this was even on his radar screen.

Referrals are a tricky business, especially the receiving part. It's not always easy to control the number of referrals you receive. Yes, you can ask for them and you'll receive more, but that's a different post.

In my experience and in conversations with the top business networkers in my own network there seems to be some consensus that there is a give to receive referral ratio. It's truly going to depend on your business and how easy or difficult it is for others to refer you, but the most common ration seems to be 3:1

For every 3 referrals that you give you should receive 1 referral. This ratio is in the short term. Over time your ratio is likely to get a little better.

Again, this is an average. For some folks it might be 5:1 or 10:1, others might be really easy to refer and will see the reverse: 1:3 or 1:2.

Give some thought to what your own referral metric is. Start paying attention to it, and you might even think about starting to track it.

Now for the networking tip. The most important part of this equation is the front half of the ratio. How much are you giving? If you want to receive 2 good referrals a week wouldn't it make sense to give 6 qualified referrals so that you'll get the 2 if your ratio is 3:1?

It's much easier to control, measure and track the number of referrals you're giving. The focused networking groups I belong to are full of top notch referrers. Several of them have turned referring into a daily habbit. They set a goal of finding a way to give at least 1 good referral a day. Just being aware of this makes you think about how you can make those referrals.

You can also leverage your networking at events to accelerate your giving. Last night I attended Texchange. I met some really cool folks and because I was focused on them, and finding referral opportunities I was able to have some really neat conversations. Over the course of the night I created 6 referral opportunities. 2 I was able to make on the spot because the people were there at the event and I just made an introduction. The rest will receive virtual e-mail introductions so that they can connect with the people I think they can help or vice-versa.

What's your referral ratio? How much should you try to give in order to receive what you want?

Happy Networking!

Scott Ingram
NetworkInAustin.com

In my experience the biggest reason most people network is to create opportunities (If they're doing it right they're creating opportunities for themselves AND for others). Not to mention a whole slew of other positive side effects.

In this networking context there's a lot of good, but there's also some bad and some ugly. One of the toughest parts of networking is knowing how to handle bad news or negative press about someone else in your network.

This stuff can really go a couple of ways. In some cases the information will be about someone you don't know very well. In which case you probably want to take a closer look at that person and think about your future relationship. Is this person ethical? Do they come from a place of integrity or would it be better for you to distance yourself from them. Personally I've removed a couple of connections on LinkedIN after hearing very negative things about some folks who I'd met with a time or two, but didn't really have a deep relationship. I also did my due diligence and verified the negative claims before taking this action.

Other times the bad news will be about people you have a much deeper relationship with. Because of your depth of relationship hopefully you'll already know that they're one of the good guys. So what do you do when you hear nasty stuff about them? You tell them! Wouldn't you want to know if somebody was talking trash about you? Maybe a client of yours is upset with you because of an incident outside or your control or even outside of your knowledge. Wouldn't you want an opportunity to reach out to the client and fix the issue, even if it wasn't your fault. So they aren't out there telling some horror story to everyone they meet about you?

Tell your core network what you're hearing about them. Not just the bad. Tell them when you hear somebody bragging on them as well. Give them the opportunity to thank that person so they'll continue that behavior. We love it when people say great things about us!

What are people really saying about you? The only way to really know is to have a great network out there listening for you who will report back.

Happy Networking!

Scott Ingram
NetworkInAustin.com

Emily took the girls to get some pictures taken on Friday... This process was difficult enough with 1. Now trying to get the two of them to cooperate simultaneously is a near impossibility. Not the case on Friday. They must have both been in a great mood. Emily came home with a stack of pictures and a CD with 160 more. They were all good. I couldn't believe it.

I've been given a hard time more than once for now having pictures of the girls with me. Now I have absolutely no excuse! For those of you who've been asking for pictures here they are. I've pulled out the best of the best and uploaded them: Scott Ingram's Picasa Site

Happy Networking!

Scott Ingram
NetworkInAustin.com

Ordinarily I am rediculously diligent about having business cards with me. With stashes in my coat pockets, glove compartment, laptop bag, etc. It's nearly impossible for me to be without cards.

Of course this Sunday I was caught in a perfect storm of not having cards. I went for an early morning cycling trip on Loop 360 here in Austin. Met with a small group that had invited me in the past and got a chance to get to know a couple of really great guys during the ride. When we got back to the parking lot where we'd all started it was time for the card exchange. There I was.... No Cards! I'd brought my bike in my wife's van where I didn't have a stash.

The situation was easily rectified. I did get cards from the other guys and followed-up with my own contact information. However the experience taught me (again), that you never know where you're going to be when you need a couple of cards.

The solution is pretty straight forward. Stash those puppies everywhere you can think of: At home, at your office, in your coats (purses for the ladies), in your cars, everywhere! I'm never a fan of the mangled card in the wallet, but a mangled card with your phone number and e-mail address sure beats the heck out of no card at all when you really need it.

Happy Networking!

Scott Ingram
www.NetworkInAustin.com

New business relationships are one of the most exciting parts about networking. You never know where it is going to lead. Will your new friend open the door to huge untapped opportunities, or will it prove to be another learning experience?

I always take a 'give and see' approach. I'm not sure if I've always done this. It's likely that I have, but only recently have I noticed that I even have a strategy around new relationships like this. I tend to be a little different than what the traditional networking advice will tell you to do. I'll spend a lot less time than most learning about the personal side of the other person. Family, kids, hobbies, etc. Not that those things aren't important, I just tend to get to them a little later in the relationship.

In my very first meeting or two with a new connection I'm rediculously focused on how I can help them. If I met them in a business context then there's probably a business reason why they were out networking in the first place. So what is that reason? I'll look as hard as I can for some way to provide value. Sometimes this is a referral, other times it's just advice or an introduction to someone else who can be more helpful than me because of their own background, industry or connections.

Once I've figured out how to help I do it. This is the deposit or the 'give' that I mentioned earlier. If I've promised a referral or introduction I make it. Quite often there are a couple of follow-up items for me to execute based on our first meeting. Then... I wait and see.

There are several levels of response that give me a pretty good indication of how good or helpful my new networking friend is going to be.

Level 1 and sadly the most common level is nothing. Without my prompting I won't get anything back. They become a communication vacuum and I don't hear anything from them proactively. You can guess what kind of category I put these folks into. [This is only a mental category, it's not like I have a loser field in my contact manager or anything... Hmmm?]

Level 2 is a minimal response. They might send a real quick e-mail thank you, but that's where the buck stops. This is a satisfactory response as it's much better than nothing, but it's hardly what you're looking for especially if you've made a solid introduction or referral for them.

Level 3 is the beginning of good quality networking. They will communicate and keep me in the loop. If the referral I made didn't work out they'll give me the heads up and let me know why (so I can be of better help next time). If it did work out they give me the heads up and let me know why. They will typically show some level of appreciation. (Most times a thank you is enough, this isn't necessarily a monetary step).

Level 4 may or may not communicate as well as a Level 3. What they will do is make an effort to reciprocate. They'll make an introduction, referral, or provide some form of value within a reasonable amount of time. Sadly, too many Level 4 networkers then drop the ball and don't follow-up, or otherwise disappear in the early stages of the relationship when extra time and attention are typically necessary.

Level 5 is where you can almost instantly identify the great networkers. These folks either did the same thing that I did in the beginning and worked to understand how they could help me. If they didn't they work quickly to catch-up and make sure they know what they can do. Then they execute themselves. They do all of the things they promised to do and follow-up appropriately.

Without making a deposit, or finding some way to give to the other person in your new relationships it's really hard to identify what type of networker you're dealing with. Your networking efforts will be far less effective than they could be and you could end up spending months on a new relationship only to find out they're a Level 1 or 2 and aren't likely to help you in growing your business.

I always struggle with making this point and not having people take it the wrong way. It's important not to prejudge any relationship, and to be forgiving of those who don't perform the way you'd hoped. It doesn't mean you malign or mistreat the relationships that don't immediately bear fruit. Some relationships just take longer. However, you DO want to make sure you invest more of your time and energy into developing relationships with the Level 4 and 5 networkers. The more you value them, the more they'll value you.

Don't believe me? You probably already have a couple of good Level 4 or 5 networkers in your own circle. Find a way to help them out and watch what happens.

Happy Networking!

Scott Ingram
NetworkInAustin.com