After years of networking, referrals still don't always make sense to me. They never seem to come from the people I'd expect them from. The lesson I've learned is that it's most important to take care of those people who DO refer you.

Referral partners don't always work out the way we think they will. I'll be the first to admit that I've spent dozens of hours getting to know certain individuals who I thought could refer me a lot of business. I've bought them lunch after lunch, learned about their business, their families and their interests. I worked hard to make sure I gave them value. Usually in the form of referrals to help them grow their own businesses. Even still, some of these folks have NEVER referred me. Not because we don't have a great relationship and trust each other. It just hasn't happened.

I went through this experience over and over while I was building my IT consulting business in California. Fortunately I've learned from my mistakes since I've been here in Austin.

I'm always surprised by where my referrals come from. The individuals that refer me are almost never the people I would expect. Here's they key: If someone refers you once they are far more likely to refer you again... and again... and again!

Pay close attention to where you referrals come from. Spend the bulk of your time cultivating relationships with those people who DO refer you, not on those who COULD refer you. Of course I'm not saying you shouldn't be building new relationships with people who are in a great position to refer you. I'm simply suggesting that you invest in the people who are already helping you.

Add value however you can. Certainly the best way to thank someone for a referral is to turn around and refer them. That's what most people are looking for, but don't assume. Take the time to get to know the great people who refer you. What makes them tick? Look for things that you can do for them that may not be obvious. Only by asking and building an even stronger relationship will you learn how you can really help someone.

If you're anything at all like me one of the key reasons you network is to get referrals. Do a good job of taking care of the people who take care of you, and you'll get more and wonderful referrals.

Happy networking!

Scott Ingram
NetworkInAustin.com