We all know people who handle stress better than others.  What is it that makes some people so good at handling stress and others turn into complete basket cases?  What determines how well you dispose of the stress in your life?

A great deal of the difference is the mental attitude of the individual. It's not just a matter of positive thinking, of maintaining a "glass is half-full" mentality.  Stress arises largely from our perception that events are threatening, or more than we can handle.  But if we perceive potentially stressful events as opportunities for change or growth, we can learn to handle stress better. Here are a number of coping strategies that you can use to  transform your stress into a source of positive energy that you can put to use for your own good.

Focus on the solution.  Examine the situation and to the degree you can do something, try to resolve it.  Take action sooner, rather than later, to prevent the situation from snowballing into an overwhelming event.  Break big problems down into smaller, more manageable problems and deal with those one at a time.  If there is nothing you can do to resolve the situation, accept it and move on.  Nothing is more stressful than worrying about a problem that is out of your control. 

Recall past success.   Do you remember the last time you felt this much stress?  How did that situation turn out?  Chances are that you came through just fine (you’re here, aren’t you?).  And if the situation didn’t turn out successfully, you can probably find something positive about the experience.  Think about the positive outcomes that came from a seemingly “bad” decision.  Realize that whatever happens, you can handle it.  Stress provides lessons that make you more capable of dealing with stress in the future.

Reframe the situation.  Search for the opportunity that is lurking behind the stressful situation.  Begin to see how you might be able to re-interpret a problem as a challenge.  What can you learn from this situation?  How might you be able to apply things you’ve learned in the past?  Finding a reason for your pain makes it a bit more bearable.  And reinterpreting events in this way helps improve your self-esteem and your sense of control over stress.

Take a break.  Take a walk, get a massage or play a fast-paced game of racquetball.  Become aware of what your body is telling you.  When you feel tight due to too much stress, physical activity can help you relieve not only the physical symptoms, but can help you re-focus your mental energy as well.  

Get support.  Find someone who can help.  If you can, delegate part of the workload to make it less overwhelming.  Talk to someone with experience in this area, ask for (and follow) their advice.  Or just find a friend who is willing to listen and support you.

Stressful situations are a fact of life.  But facing stress does not necessarily mean that you must feel stressed.  Learning a few simple strategies can help you cope with stress and use that energy in a more positive way.